Shocker: Male Crotch Flashing Is Fashionable, Too

The Borat thong is in high demand these days

  Fashion of the future...
It was about time someone took action and did something about it. I absolutely applaud John Mayer for taking the initiative, and showing the world what equality between men and women really means. Well, it's only fair - since for so long, women were the only ones who were considered promiscuous and obscene for (voluntarily or involuntarily) flashing their crotches. And yes, for the record, vagina flashes are NOT cool, but boy, were we terrorized by them over the past few years. Some of the famous ladies out there (I had to stop myself from writing "some of the ladies out there who are famous for no reason whatsoever" - oops, I guess I let it slip after all) such as Lindsay, Brit Brit and Paris turned not wearing panties into an art - a gross one, for all that matters, but an art nevertheless. My question for you however is "how come only the girls get trashed for doing this"?

Well, not anymore. Say goodbye, Paris - you can keep your panties and your firecrotch to yourself, Lindsay - there's a new guy in town, and he's giving you all a run for your money. I'm talking about musician John Mayer, whom I rather like, although I'm not sure I'll ever be able to forgive him for dating Jessica Simpson. Well, Mayer decided to defy all standards of male swim wear, and during a three day Carnival Caribbean cruise (called the Mayercraft) last weekend treated his guests to more than just a concert. So he took a leaf out of Borat's book and took to the deck of the ship wearing a neon green one piece suit that left very little to the imagination. And I mean very, very little.

So, as I was telling you, no more female monopoly on crotch flashing. John Mayer is a brave pioneer, and we respect his efforts to put male crotches back on the market and give them all the credit and attention that female crotches get. We appreciate his initiative so much that we'll all try to forget the fact that he also forgot to shave certain areas of his body. Well, you take a look at the photo and see what I mean. I will not even dream of asking what got into his head and made him don the infamous onesie, as I feel that is a question best left unanswered. However, I do think that green is really not his color. How about a striped, purple and yellow thong? Now that would really bring out the color of his eyes...