Who Let Her Out of the (Pussy)Cat House With That Dress???

Nicole looks less like a cat, more like a torn-up piece of cloth

  Not the best look she ever rocked...
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I have no idea what Nicole Scherzinger is supposed to be wearing in this photo, but one thing I do know for sure: it's definitely not a dress. It just can't be. Unless they changed the definition of the seemingly harmless piece of a woman's attire, or some crazy, alien cult has taken over the world and is replacing fashion sense with tracksuit sense. Really, just take a closer look at Nicole's dress and you'll come to realize she's actually secretly promoting the newest line of gym workout suits from some big time producer who's in search of his feminine side. Otherwise I can't explain the atrocity Nicole is wearing and which she's trying to pass for a dress. Needless to say, she fails miserably.

First of all, the upper part of the...(it still pains me to call it) dress looks like it was put together from a flag Nicole found, tore apart and then put together again. It's really not a fortunate combination of colors and textures, not to mention that adding the black lower part into the mix makes it even more disastrous. There is a noticeable, unflattering contrast between the upper and lower halves of the dress that makes it look like someone attached a skirt to a workout outfit and gave then to Nicole to wear. The combination is not only strange, it also does nothing for Nicole's beautiful body, as it covers her up more efficiently than even a nun's robe.

In addition to the disastrous choice of dress, Nicole's hair stylist and make-up artist must hate her guts. I'd really like to know what she did and how she offended them - otherwise I can't understand how they let her go out in public with those horrible bags under her eyes and looking distinctly like she just got out of bed. I won't even mention the hair too much - just enough to say that it makes Nicole look like some sort of Amy Winehouse predecessor. That thing on her head is either a beehive in the making, or for some reason she felt the need to hide an ostrich egg in her hair. Either way, I think it hasn't been a very good day for Nicole - and I know for a fact she can look a million times better than this. So...what can I say. Hope it never happens again. You know, like...never.

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